Theodore Roosevelt actually said...

"But it is of high consequence to the country that the statistical work of the census shall be conducted with entire accuracy."

"I do not believe in the doctrine that to the victor belong the spoils; but I think even less of the doctrine that the spoils shall be divided without a fight by the professional politicians on both si..."

"The noncompetitive examination in a case like this is not only vicious, but is in effect a fraud upon the public."

"I do this with extreme reluctance."