Theodore Roosevelt actually said...

"I think you will do me the justice to say that I do not say what I do not mean."

"We have Biblical authority, as well as the authority of common sense, for the statement that the rain falls on the just and the unjust alike."

"We shall keep in the run, not only of abiding but of increasing prosperity, if as a people we only keep our sanity."

"And again I wish to thank you for these splendid gifts which will commemorate as pleasant a forty-eight hours as any President ever spent since the White House was built."