Barack Obama actually said...

"If you're starting to get a temperature—your ears are ringing, your eyes are blurry, you're showing symptoms, you can't remember what you just said last week—don't worry, because this is a curable con..."

"I said we'd transition out of Afghanistan, and we are."

"The future rewards those who press on. I don't have time to feel sorry for myself. I don't have time to complain. I'm going to press on."

"We've come too far to come back now."