Donald Trump: “Departing for the Great State of North Carolina! https://t.co/BjnyTnnHUt”

Everyone’s going to be thrilled.

Together, we will defend our Constitution, which protects our freedoms; uphold the dignity of every individual; strengthen the free market, which has made us the most prosperous country ever to exist; and ensure that the promise of America…

I don’t mind guardrails.

Please pretend I’m on the ballot. Because in a way, I am on the ballot.