In the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic. If you want to beat me up -- feel free. You cannot beat me up more than I have already beaten up myself.

We're sorry that John Edwards betrayed her. We're sorry that John Edwards betrayed his country. But the man was running for president and lying about an affair. And he could have blown up the Democratic Party if he had gotten the…

I'm proud of where I come from.

I hate to admit it, but I'm not the best parent in my family. The best parent in my family is here with me today. It's my wife Elizabeth, who is right down here.

In the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic. If you want to beat me up -- feel free. You cannot beat me up more than I have already beaten up myself.

In 2006, I made a serious error in judgment and conducted myself in a way that was disloyal to my family and to my core beliefs. I recognized my mistake and I told my wife that I had a liaison with another woman, and I asked for her…

The truth of the matter is that, McCain's response to this trip has not been very effective at all.

The truth of the matter is, is that McCain's response to this trip has not been very effective at all.

McCain just seems frustrated. They seem angry. And they seem to be doing stupid things, in a time when Obama is having a very good week.

I think Barack Obama is having his way this week. I mean, he's got a golden glow.

I think the Obama campaign was wrong.

Senator McCain is the first -- would be the first time -- first person to get elected that's over 70. He has his own hurdles.

Being a fighter pilot doesn't qualify you to be president. I think he was absolutely right.

Of course it's satire. And it's a magazine that has a long, rich and illustrative history of using satire.

I think people that want change in this country, which are an overwhelming number of them, a majority of them are going to vote for Senator Obama.

The problem is, he can't get the yoke of the Bush administration and these disastrous right-wing policies from around his neck.

It is possible to call -- to say something about John McCain, who is a war hero. That doesn't mean you're unpatriotic.

I think Senator McCain will be the first time first person to get elected that's over 70. He has his own hurdles but the problem is he can't get the yoke of the Bush administration and these disastrous right wing policies from around his…